I
really thought that I'd be able to process the verdict regardless of
how and where it came down, so no one was more surprised than me that I
absolutely lost it - cried hysterically (an absolute shock because in spite of some of my own
recent very personal losses hysterics didn't
come to play on those occasions) because apparently this grief was old - it was ancestor grief - it was from
the bowels of the rotting ships crossing the Atlantic 400 years ago -
it was that of that first mother seeing that first son put on that block
and sold into hell - it was things I didn't realize abode within my
rudimentary heart and soul. Now released it is truly for me the drum
beat of change.
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